The Top 10 Beards In Film
Kurt Russell as R.J. MacReady in The Thing
If there was one single beard that could make a man look like he eats nails and sh*ts bricks this would be that beard. The beard gets extra points because The Thing is one of my favourite films.
Samuel L. Jackson as Jules Winnfield in Pulp Fiction
I don’t think there’s a more quotable movie hardass than Jules Winnfield, he had the beard to match. What kind of man has ‘Bad Mother Fucker’ written on there wallet, only a man with a beard like Jules.
Clint Eastwood as Blondie in The Good The Bad And The Ugly
My favourite anti hero in cinema history, gruff and independent, he had the beard to match. Younger movie goers who haven’t seen Clint Eastwoods films made in the 60′s and 70′s probably only know him as the guy who makes touching films, anyone who’s a little older or has a deeper history knows that he’s a man who’ll shoot you, bang your girl and ride his horse across the desert while saying something badass like ‘You see, in this world there’s two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.’ An Alpha male in every way.
Toshirô Mifune as Dr. Kyojô Niide in Akahige (Red Beard)
Mifune always carries a lot of power in his films, it is rumoured his strength came from his awesome beard. Playing a Samurai, Ronin, Yakuza and Warrior in over a hundred movies breeds awesomeness. This is the guy who Clint Eastwood adopted his persona. Red Beard was his finest bearded achievement.
Gerard Butler as King Leonidas in 300
One of the most bad ass and manliest characters in film. This beard gets extra points for some of the quotes from him ‘Spartans! Ready your breakfast and eat hearty… For tonight, we dine in hell! ‘ and another gem ‘Give them nothing! But take from them everything! ‘
Al Pacino as Officer Frank Serpico in Serpico
This beard looks like it infiltrated Pacino’s face, that can only be a good thing when talking about awesome beards. This was a toss up with Pacino;s beard in Carlito’s Way, another classic beard
Zach Galifianakis as Alan Garner in The Hangover
Hands down the movie beard of 2009, it showed the world that having a beard like Rick Ross does not have the same affect on a white guy, you just look like a weird awkward guy who is incredibly funny.
Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber in Die Hard
Hans Gruber is also in my top 10 movie deaths (coming soon). One of my favourite villains of all time also has one of the best beards. The other 3 Die Hard movies haven’t got a lick on the original, all due to the fact that Hans Gruber’s beard wasn’t present.
Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow in the Pirates Of The Carribean series
I’m not a big fan of the series to be honest, I have a baseless deep seeded hatred for Keira Knightly and Orlando Bloom. It’s not original to say Johnny Depp is the best thing about the series but simply, he is, and by a long stretch. From when you can braid your beard you know you can throw around the word epic liberally.
Chia Hui Liu as Pai Mei in Kill Bill Vol 2
This is the best beard to eyebrow combination. the fact that the beard is fake doesn’t even matter, it’s too epic to be discounted.
Sean Connery & Brian Blessed – Lifetime Achievment
These two have been rocking an epic beard for half a century, for that I salute them with the lifetime achievement award. Brian Blessed’s voice is the epitome of the word bellowing, Sean Connery is Sean Connery nuff said.
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